Life of a tired momma

Week 2 well 3 really ha ha ha

2011-09-12T13:15:00.002-05:00

So far so good! I have joined a gym and go every night after work. Right now I'm doing the treadmill mostly just to get my endurance up, but I go at 3mph for 45 min with varying inclines so I'm getting a good bang for my buck so to speak. I have also been doing the other machines, but not when there are a ton of ppl in the gym. Still really self conscious about that, however I'm up to 50 reps on both ab machines at 50lbs. I started at 10 if I was lucky at 10 lbs.

Still drinking tons of water and teas. I did have ONE soda last week (hanging head in shame..lol) AND 3 beers last weekend (hangs head in shame AGAIN). And I've reintroduced carbs, and I'm not KILLING myself monitoring them, but I don't eat as many as before.

So far the grand total is 16lbs down...YAY ME! But it's still a long road ahead, I have to say though I like how I have more energy after working out. Odd how I don't feel tired but amped up, so now after my nice lunch I'm going to turn on the tunes and start doing some cleaning around this joint!

Improving myself

2011-09-04T23:24:00.002-05:00

About a month ago I stepped on a scale, and practically burst into tears. I knew I was overweight (obese actually) but I had no idea it was as bad as it was. Yankton has decided to sponsor a sort of biggest loser thing called YankTON Challenge. Since the bank is sponsoring us, I decided to sign up. But there are other reasons too, my father was morbidly obese and where kidney cancer is what he died from, his weight was a factor in not finding it sooner. I have struggled with my size for as long as I can remember, not in the sense where I have an eating disorder but to not become as large as he was.

Week one!
I have a bicycle thing I keep under my desk at work, so I've been peddling while working, it doesn't get me any cardio type of workout, but it helps my arthritic knees not hate me so much and it does burn calories. I joined a gym that has 24 hr access, so I go after I get off from work at 1am. Most of the time a friend of mine and I go together, but I'm at a point where I'm even going alone too. Something I would never do normally, however I like how I've been feeling after I'm done and my energy level has gone up too.

I am doing the South Beach diet...phase one. I'm not doing the entire diet that way but I like the phase one where you cut out carbs completely. It's not as hard as you think it might be, although I miss bread and pasta....and beer. I REALLY MISS BEER!!

Greg is doing the challenge too, and he's lost 9 lbs. I'm really proud of him too! I am motivated not only for my health, but just to feel better about how I look when I see myself in a mirror.

After week one....down ELEVEN lbs. I'm proud of myself, and it's a great start. I do know it's going to taper off too and won't and shouldn't be like that each week. It is a great morale booster though!

Overtime

2011-07-27T22:47:00.004-05:00

Both Greg and I have been working quite a bit of overtime these days. It's exhausting, I work from 4:30pm - 1:00 am and I have been going into work from 9am - 11am all week this week too. I did work a couple of straight 10 hour shifts, which are easier than coming in early, but the hours for that haven't been offered for a while. So I'm sleeping less. Which makes for a cranky mom.

Right now my biggest worry is Vincent. He has developed the thinking that he may go anywhere he wishes at whatever time he wishes and does not need to ask permission to do so. This is unacceptable, and he KNOWS this. I have grounded and grounded him and he does OK for a little while then he's back at it. NO MORE!!!!!! I have told him that if he EVER tried to sneak out or goes MIA again I am going to report him as a runaway. I realize this may seem a bit extreme but I'm at a loss of what else to do. The kids he's hanging out with when he does this are much older than he is and he is playing with fire (figuratively as we have not had pyro problems since the "big kahuna" two years ago) It stinks on ice not to be able to trust your own kid to make the right decisions, when you've taught them how to make them.

There are days it's like watching a train wreck about to happen and I'm helpless to stop it. He has potential to do great things, and most days is the hardest working kid I've ever seen. But if he's not directed constantly, he's easily led astray and I fear for him. He's made SERIOUSLY bad choices, and paid the price for those. In losing trust with Greg and me, in having suspicion cast upon him if ANYTHING happens in our neighborhood. These things KILL me inside, and I cannot seem to get through to him. When I sit him down and talk to him, he is genuinely remorseful and tries to do the right thing, but inevitably falls back into the same old patterns.

I only want the best for him, but he needs to understand that I expect better OF him. I am hopeful though that one day the light bulb will glow brightly and he'll get it.

Neglectful

2011-07-18T00:09:00.002-05:00

I suppose I've become rather neglectful of my blog. Quite honestly I don't think anyone ever reads it anyway. But I figure I should at least update from time to time.

I'm currently doing this from work, it's nice to be able to have Internet access from my job. It's slow enough tonight that I have time to do this. If it were Monday, forget it, Monday's are hell in the credit card business. I don't know if I will be welding for a living again, the economy is brutal and I have really good insurance right now. I also actually have a 401K that MADE MONEY!!!!! It's not a bad place to work, I just don't make as much money as I would welding, and I don't think I'll get anywhere else in the company except where I am right now. I'm not overly fond of the bottom of the food chain. I suppose I shouldn't complain at all as I know there are people out there in much worse situations, then again I don't think it's that bad to aspire for something better in a place I am at 8 hours every day.

I have come to the conclusion that I am getting old. SHOCKER I know! (please note dripping sarcasm) I have had a few times recently where I've been seeing how the world is an adventure for other people (the younger ones :) ) and finding myself a little jealous of having that freedom.

Then I really thought about it one day, yes that "everyday is an adventure" part of my life isn't as prevalent. I don't wonder where I should go this week, and my life revolves around my children and what they have going on and who needs to be shuttled where. That is sort of the other part of my "midlife" crisis, the children have gone off and gotten LIVES!

I'll say more another time - just don't know what all TO say :)

Sooooooo

2010-12-15T02:48:00.001-06:00

it's my birthday. And oddly enough I think my Mom will be the one person to remember without an acutal reminder...or possibly checking my evil fb status. How sad is that. But I've made it another year, and I'm still tickled pink to be walking on the planet and watching my amazing family! All else is a bonus.

An update....

2010-06-23T22:54:00.004-05:00

Not that my life is exciting, which I am just fine with because it seems that when my life becomes exciting these days it's due to something rotten happening. Dull is all gouda to me :)
So here's what's been going on:

Kids:
School is out for the summer...kids are thrilled...I however am now a proponent for year round school. This is for a couple of reasons, one because I get tired of hearing "I'm bored", and also I think they forget about 20% of what they learn during the school year and spend the first 9 weeks of school playing catch up.

Lilly is one seriously busy young lady - she turned 10 in April, and it never ceases to amaze me that she is less of a child and more of a young adult. She is still involved with orchestra and is even volunteering to play at the assisted living center my Grandmother lives at. She is beginning to take tae kwando which I think will help with her coordination not to mention being able to defend herself later won't hurt either. She is also doing flag corp and girl scouts as well. I swear her schedule makes ME tired.

Vincent isn't involved with much extra activities although he will be taking a couple of cooking classes this summer and he is very excited about that. He has also gotten his very first paddle fish tag for this fall, he is super excited about that. I do think we are going to have to tie him down so that the fish doesn't haul him into the river! He's been subject to some serious bullying this year and it breaks my heart and requires much self restraint not to go kick someones ass. But that would not teach him the correct path, and that is my job. But I hate seeing him suffer. So I have been occupying him by allowing him to spend a few days with friends on their farm and having sleepovers at other friends homes so he is out of the neighborhood and enjoying himself.

Isabella broke her arm earlier this year, she fell off her bike. She was lucky enough to not need an actual cast and could get by with a brace. Oddly enough I had to keep shooing her OFF the monkey bars, I caught her several times hanging by one arm. One time she was on the rings and said, I'm not hanging on the MONKEY BARS, I'm hanging on the RINGS. This is when I needed to explain to her I would prefer she not be HANGING off ANYTHING until her arm had healed. She is bull headed sometimes...where could she POSSIBLY have gotten that trait from? She is also took a cooking class this year and loved it, they did not actually do the cooking, but the prep work and she had a great time.

Of course there are swimming lessons in July as I am adamant about those. This year they all get to be at the same location and the SAME TIME. I only have to go to the pool once a day...whoop!

Garden:

We have the garden in, Greg planted most of it, so we have 8 million rows of potatoes and 6 tomato plants....this is where I roll my eyes. It is coming along nicely and the torrential rain and hail have not damaged it that much. This year we only planted a couple of celery plants in my herb garden. I love how they smell and I like to dry them and then grind it for seasoning. But I do not care for the taste, it seems to be extremely bitter out of the garden.

We also planted indian corn and popcorn. As I said Greg did most of the planting while I was at work, so I wasn't there to stop him...ugh.

Life:
Greg and I celebrated out 10th anniversary this year. Also amazing, I had never had a relationship last over 2 years before we were married. Mostly due to self sabotage. We have had ups and downs but I have to say he and I are a constant that I'm happy to have. I find it funny that people think 10 years is monumental. But in this instant society where things aren't built to last, people are willing to give up on things that take work. I have never been the type of person to do that, sometimes the challenge is what makes life interesting.

Work:
I am now a customer service rep for a bank. I do not have to call people, so it's not bad work. But I get yelled at a lot about interest rates...oh well..READ THE INFO WE SEND YOU!!!
I like my supervisor, and the other people I work with. The work isn't hard, and apparently I'm good at it. But I do miss welding.

That being said, Kolberg's called me and offered me my old job back, which I declined. Mostly because I do not think it is a good idea for Greg and I to work at the same place. Not because there is a conflict with us, but because I do not want to put all our eggs in one basket. I have moved him and the kids to my insurance, which is better. And with my sales I make what I was making at Kolberg's only in air conditioning and I don't light myself on fire. These are good things, also a friend of mine said anytime I want to play with a welder I can use his welding truck. Best of both worlds I suppose.

I have been working quite a bit of overtime lately and quite frankly I'm bushed. I'm not going to sign up for Friday and Sat because I'm missing spending some good summertime with the kids and I am planning to take them to the lake for a day of swimming, fishing, picnicking and other romping around. Should be a good time! The money helps but I don't want to miss out on my kids youth either. I work nights so Greg is home with them in the evening, but I have to get a little sleep in the mornings so they don't get to go outside until after 10am when I am awake. I would prefer to sleep more, but I don't think it's fair to keep them trapped indoors.

I have other things to say, and I'll do that another time....may life be grand to you and yours!

Mostly Pictures

2010-03-14T05:53:00.002-05:00

Lilly's orchestra concert from today...she loves music so much, she even wants to learn to play hand tools!

amazing

2009-12-15T02:25:00.002-06:00

I'm officially 40. Never thought I'd get this far, or have all the great things in my life either. But here I am...yay!

Hmmmmmm

2009-11-16T22:12:00.002-06:00

It's odd that I'm online only now and again lately. This is mostly due to the new job at the Bankcard center. It's not my DREAM job, but it will help pay the bills, and I have to say this company treats their employees well and the people are great. Sometimes that's all a job needs to have to be worthwhile. The job itself it interesting as well. And that's all I have to say about that. :)

I have finally come out of my "funk"! I think it was mostly due to not working and feeling pretty damned worthless because of it. My house went to hell in a hand basket, but I've been "digging out" and it's much better. I'm not ashamed for other people to walk in anymore. And I'm not as snippy to everyone either, nor am I as tired as I was for the LONGEST time. Depression is a strange creature, it not only effects the brain but nails you physically as well. And where things are not perfect nor do I think they ever will be...besides perfection is overrated :) !

The kids are doing great, we have Lil's first orchestra concert in December, and I'm so excited to see her play in a group. She works hard at it and songs are becoming more recognizable! Her grades are good and I really can't express how amazing she is.

Vincent is doing well with his speech therapy...and I can see some marked improvement with his lisp. He's slacking a bit with homework, but his reading is so much better and he's whizzing along in math too! His teacher raved about him at conferences and I was just beaming! He's had so many troubles this year. Sometimes it's just hard to be a farm kid trapped in town, when he's hanging out with other kids who live in smaller rural towns or farms...he's fine. Here in town, he gets picked on sometimes and then when he defends himself HE'S the bad guy. Tired of it and I REFUSE to punish a kid for defending himself, and if other kids parents don't like it...they can kiss my ASS.

Bella is THRIVING in kindergarten, she's READING already. She loves being student reader at school, I must say she just LOVES school. I still think she's going to take over Cuba one day, but that's just me :) I cannot believe her birthday is in roughly 3 weeks and she'll be SIX. It never ceases to amaze me how time flies.

Anyway...just figured I should update :) I'll have to get some kid pics on soon too. They are HUGE!!!!!!!!!!

Tis the season

2009-10-01T20:31:00.001-05:00

to snag paddlefish! So I will be fishing next week, I hope I get a really big one this year! They may be ugly, but they are poor man's lobster! They are also REALLY fun to catch. You don't bait a hook, you snag them and they fight like hell! I almost was drug into the river one year. So wish me luck!

Struggling.

2009-09-21T21:03:00.004-05:00

That is the one word I can use to describe me right now, struggling. I have been having to test my blood sugars (which seem to be stabilizing) over the past month. I'm struggling with my weight, my father was morbidly obese and I've found myself on a slippery slope. I'm changing things in my life to help me lose some weight and keep my blood sugars at healthy levels. But I have been finding myself exhausted all the time, honestly I think it's some depression setting in. Oddly enough though, I don't know why. I have a really good life, my family is happy and healthy. Sure some things could be better, I think most people have things in their lives they wouldn't mind being better. I just want to feel GOOD again. Oddly enough I am at a loss on how to do this simple thing. I find joy on a daily basis, but I just don't feel good. I don't know, maybe I'm just nuts.

On a happier note, I am the proud parent of a cellist! Lilly has started orchestra and I couldn't be more excited. She should have her cello this Friday, and she's pretty excited to play me the song she's learned. I hope she decides to stick with it - music is such a wonderful outlet. She's enjoying school as usual and loves her teacher, she's been blessed again with a teacher who "gets" her. I cannot tell you how important that is for her.

Vincent is doing well, he's kept himself out of trouble (mostly :) ) and has found himself involved in a love affair. Before you freak out - it's with a lawn tractor. He LOVES driving and that boy can back up a trailer better than I can! I asked him his secret and he refused to tell me! He said "It's a guy thing Ma!"

Isabella is loving school, and just joined girl scouts. She's excited but we haven't heard anything yet about her troop. She had her first school portraits and I can't wait to see the pictures! She was singing me one of her songs and I love listening to her. So every night when I making supper she sings me the apple and banana song. Which I love. I'm also going along on her field trip to the pumpkin patch in about a week. She's been there before but she's pretty stoked none the less.

All in all - life is good! I'm a mess, but life is good.

Our new addition.

2009-08-10T13:54:00.002-05:00

Meet zucchini. Yes another cat named after a vegitable. What can I say we're odd ducks like that. He's awful cute though :) He needs to put on some weight and we're treating a gnarly case of ear mites...but other than that he's a healthy little goober.

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2009-08-07T10:05:00.002-05:00

My children are very mad at me, not upset, they are MAD! Mostly because I have the nerve to ask them to clean their rooms. Bella is angry with me because today she isn't able to go outside and play, this is because she decided to throw a TWO HOUR hissy fit last night at bed time. And she's been in full blown tantrum this morning too. I am getting very tired of this "testing" of me. She has it in her head that if she whines enough she'll get her way, I do NOT know where this idea has come from since it's never worked in the past.

They are all tired of each other..and of me too I think. The girls are looking forward to school, Vincent not so much - but I think he's a little excited to get back and see his friends. But he struggles more than they do. School starts on the 19th for the older two and the 20th for Bella, so bedtime routines need to be getting earlier again. My children are less than thrilled about it all. But to send a tired child to school is a cruel thing to do to a teacher.

Today I am planning on grating up about a bazillion zucchini, I have gotten smarter and borrowed my mom's food processor. Last night I spent over an hour slicing cucumbers, made a cucumber salad and a full container of just sliced ones. I'm also thinking about roasting some chili's up too. My tomatoes are beginning to turn red, but it's just been an oddly cool summer - it's as if we are a month behind weather wise.

I've applied for my hunting licences - fall turkey, deer (archery, rifle, and muzzle loader) And I need to get out to the field to sight in my bow and gun. And just to get my archery skills up. The spot I normally hunt has become PRIME ground, as corn has been planted almost right up to where I sit. We have some people coming from Michigan this fall to archery hunt. I'm pretty sure I'll be doing most of the guiding. I need to start working out more to rehab my knee..or I'm never going to make it up and down these hills. Not to mention making it up and down them carrying all my gear or dragging a field dressed deer.

Well enough typing...off too work!

Long day

2009-08-02T21:03:00.003-05:00

Stacked wood today...by myself. Now before you say "well why didn't that big galoot of a husband HELP you." I chose to stack it all by myself. I started at 7:30am and finished at 1:00pm. And I seriously need to work on my tie in's. My first one fell and I had to redo it...after picking up the stack of wood I'd just done. But oh well. Anyway it's all good and we have almost all of our wood put up for the winter. We have 3 rows that are about 20 feet long and 6 feet high. So I'm pretty darned proud of myself, not to mention it gave me some time to myself because it was WORK and no one wanted to be around...lol.

Tomorrow I have to process more chokecherries in the morning. But more than likely I'll just be freezing the juice. I need more jars to make jam and I won't be getting those until Tuesday.
And we have a funeral to go to that evening.

It's sad when friends pass away, but I'm glad that he's not in pain anymore. It makes me crazy when people say "they are in a better place" or "everything happens for a reason". When people who are close to us pass, we miss them and it sucks and there isn't anything one can say to make it suck less. But he LOVED life, and we plan to celebrate it. I also plan to remind his wife to have the nervous breakdown she deserves. Feel what you feel...to hell with the "be strong" crap, if you need to cry, cry if you want to scream, scream. Do what you need to do to get through the day.

Anyway hug those you love every day, mostly because you should anyway:)

Tell me something

2009-07-22T12:35:00.004-05:00

Does this kid look like the Antichrist? Apparently to one of my neighbors (down the block) he is. I am VERY aware that Vincent isn't perfect - and he does get into trouble sometimes it's been pretty BIG trouble too.

That being said, I don't understand where an ADULT gets off calling a kid horrible names like "A little SHIT" or a "Bitch". I can deal with someone not wanting their kids to play with mine and I'd respect that wish as well. BUT when THOSE kids come down to our block and tell my kids they can't play with the friends they have HERE because they came and they aren't allowed to play with "THEM", I will NEVER get that. I will also not be able to understand why an ADULT would go to my son's OTHER friends parents and tell them that Vincent should NOT be allowed to play at their homes either and how that other adult is IRRATIONAL enough to do it. When Vincent came home in tears because he's no longer allowed to play with another friend - of which he's known for YEARS, I just lost it. I went to talk to the other parent who says "Vincent got her kids in trouble ..." I cut her off and yelled (not proud of that) "I HAVE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS!!!!!!!!"

I have been dealing with this WOMAN (I refuse to call her an adult anymore because she clearly isn't one) for weeks now. I have tried to be the bigger person, I even wrote her a letter as she kept hanging up on me on the phone or yelling at me as if I'm a child. I have NEVER told her kids to get out of my yard or not to be on my sidewalk. Which she has done to Vincent because he rode through a mud puddle on her sidewalk and got dirt on the rest of it - just like every other kid around here. I have instructed him to ride across the street from this woman's house from now on. But I'm just done, it's taking every ounce of my strength to not go to her house knock on her door and punch her right in the face.

I'm not one to be pushed to tears that often - I try to stay rational and calm - but I can't seem to stop crying for Vincent and the girls. They do NOT deserve to be treated this horribly by a petty miserable excuse of a human being.

I'm in love

2009-07-21T19:39:00.003-05:00

With foodgawker.com ! Another blogger that I read often mentioned it so I checked it out. It's the culinary crack of websites...and I'm soooooooooo not going to rehab! In the near future I full intend on making these little bundles of decadence.

Summer!!!!!

2009-07-06T11:30:00.004-05:00

So we've been busy this summer, and oddly enough it's getting ready for fall. Tending the garden which has been doing very well this year. Although my radishes were a little disappointing - but for some reason I have NEVER been able to grow radishes. I will never understand why I cannot grow radishes.

We've also been splitting wood. I have been less than pleased with the hubby on that front. He'll complain of being tired after we split wood. He runs the HANDLE...Vincent and I do all the lifting and throwing of wood. I have figured out when we cut wood I will move a tree roughly eight times before it's ash. This weekend I moved about 2000 lbs of wood - TWICE. With a bum knee as well...but I'm the "weaker" sex. My eye! I may complain about cutting, splitting, stacking, hauling wood - but in the end it's worth it. Especially when we get our minimal gas bill in the winter. But I figure if I'm moving all that wood, I can complain about it if I want to :P

I'm still not working outside the home. Unemployment around here is through the roof and it's really sad. In no way does my family have it all that bad, we have plenty of food to eat, a roof over our heads, and our ship is in no way sinking. But I do miss working sometimes - I enjoy my kids everyday of my and their lives - even when they make me crazed. I give them credit too, they have a zest for life that is just unmatched! They enjoy themselves wherever they are, I do wish they'd enjoy themselves a little less in the grocery store though! :) But they have become more independent and don't always want/need to be around me all the time anymore. I have to admit I do miss that clingyness sometimes. I'm proud of the people they are becoming.

Bella starts Safety Town this week, Vincent -archery, and Lilly goes to art class. They are all pretty jazzed about it too. I'll try to remember to post pictures too :)

Long story short

2009-06-07T19:12:00.002-05:00

I haven't been blogging too much, I've been living and enjoying the outside world instead. We went to Michigan - the UP over Memorial day...I will go into detail later. But I found a picture I took the last time the kids and I were there, I took a similar one this trip. WOW have they changed!

Don't piss on my leg and tell me it's raining.

2009-05-11T23:53:00.002-05:00

So the Trans Canada pipe line is going through here. With all the lay offs, there were a ton of welders who were hopeful for jobs. Well they've pretty much said kiss our asses...only nicer. You have to be in the union - and here in South Dakota that's a swear word. Honestly I'd join one - at this point I just want to work and pay my bills.

The local "important" people think people should tailor their hours to the workers because they work 10 to 12 hours a day. Um I worked 10 to 12 hours a day...no one tailored their hours to me, or the other people I worked with. Not to mention the fact that people are saying how it's this great economic stimulus for Yankton. Sure it is, for the next 5 months, I hope the people who are counting on this influx are smart enough to plan for the exodus as well. But I don't think the foresight is there, and quite frankly it's PISSING ME OFF!

I am an eternal optimist in general. I know I'll find work again, I know this isn't going to be forever. I am lucky enough to have married a pessimist who thought of hard times when we were house shopping. This is why we're not endanger of losing our home like so many others.

I just see where this whole thing is going to end up - the pipeline will be built - the workers will be on their merry way - and the "important" people will go "Oh woe is me" yet again, and I'm SICK TO DEATH of that crap. I just want to walk up to them, smack them in the back of the head and yell - "PLAN AHEAD YOU TWIT". But I won't - however I have decided to not remain silent when asked what I think of the whole thing is. MUAHAHAHAHA

Jam season has offically started

2009-04-30T14:05:00.005-05:00

I made some dandelion jelly. Yes from the little yellow flowers that are the bane of most people's lawns. It has a citruslike flavor and a bit of an astringent finish. Honestly it cleanses the palate really well. Most people are afraid of it at first, but once they try it most of them are hooked on it. I used to sell it at a market here, but I don't like the way they are running it now, so I won't sell there. I have had some old customers track me down and ask for some, that makes one feel good.

Mostly I hoard it - then give it as gifts. I love giving gifts that I make, be it crocheted, baked, or processed. I feel giving my TIME is better than money - and I don't have tons of that lying around either. Not to mention that way you can USE the gift I've given you. I could be a dork but oh well :)

Spring!

2009-04-17T08:19:00.008-05:00

Dare I say it...I think spring is here! FINALLY!!!!!!!!!!!! We've tilled the garden, I raked out and remulched the flower beds, pruned the raspberries - which were kind enough to chew the living daylights out of my arms, raked the lawn! We'll start planting on May 1st and I'm so stoked!

Tomorrow is Lilly's 9th birthday - I can hardly believe she's 9! She's becomming an amazing young lady. That's so odd to call her that, but she's really not a little kid anymore - well she is, but at the same time - not. She's got so much going for her, she's intelligent, kind hearted, strong willed, atheletic, and just amazing in general.

She's almost as tall as I am now and is wearing my shoes as well - and they FIT HER!!!!!!! The only pair I've deemed off limits though are my chucks...those are MINE and only MY feet will go in them...and believe me she soooooo wants them - they are red - her favorite color.

She loves to write poetry and songs - and I have to say some of the things she writes just blow me away - her brain twirls differently than mine for sure and I love to watch it spin. She is very artistic as well - give her some art supplies and paper and she's one happy camper. Dramatic too - and like her father has this booming voice - she has always been able to project to the "cheap seats".

She wants to start babysitting - so this summer I've signed her up for a babysitters clinic. She also wants to learn to knit - another class because I cannot knit, I can crochet but not knit.

She saved me from myself, when I found out I was pregnant with her I was 29 years old and not really getting anywhere in life. But I saw the little plus on the test and my first thought was, I need to get it together - it's not about me anymore. She was a rough pregnancy, I had a fibroid cycst the size of a large grapefruit develop when I was a few months pregnant. When it "died" I had an option of surgery to have it removed, but I asked if there was any risk to the baby and when I was told ther was I said no - I'll wait. It put me at high risk - and I had tons of US with her. I had said to my Dr. "this may be my one chance so I'll hang upside down in gravity boots if needed". I had the surgery when she was 6 months old, my Dr. told me I had made the right choice not having the surgery. The cyst was so large that I'd have lost her if I'd had the surgery while pregnant.

I could go on and on, but I think I'll save it for her tomorrow. I'm amazed and honored to be her momma.

Snow day

2009-04-01T09:03:00.001-05:00

The kids had a snow day yesterday. Although there really wasn't any snow - but we were in a blizzard warning. We were lucky enough to not get hit with the blizzard.
Kids were at each others throats for a while, but then I reminded them if they didn't have anything better to do than fight...I had chores for them. Amazingly enough they were getting along much better after that.

I also made a discovery, when THIS jumps out at you from around the corner with a little samurai sword and says "BEWARE EVIL DOERS!" it is impossible not to giggle.

7 years ago tomorrow.

2009-03-24T21:53:00.005-05:00

I had a beautiful baby boy. Lilly was almost two years old. I was planning her birthday party while in the hospital.

Vincent has been an adventure every day of his life! When he learned to walk he instantly started to climb! He was given the nickname "Monkey Boy". I am amazed at the kid he's become. He's kind and courteous - he will hold a door open for me or any female and say "ladies first". When it snows he goes over to an elderly neighbor's house and clears her walk, and never asks to be paid. He doesn't even tell them he does it, he just does. He helps me in the kitchen, and helps me haul wood.

He has tested me many times - he used to walk into neighbor's houses all the time when he was 3. He used to take off to the park because he wanted to when he was 4. He's played with matches when he was 5. He's made me want to hug him and strangle him all in the same day, sometimes in the same hour.

He has his own difficulties to deal with - he has a pretty hefty lisp. He's going to begin speech therapy soon. His lisp has made learning to read harder for him, because phonetics don't work for him. The way HE sounds things out and the way they ARE sounded out are very different sometimes. But he never let it get him down. He went to tutoring with no arguments - he even enjoyed it. He's a little guy - he has his mother's height, or lack there of. But it never gets in his way . If he can't reach something, he'll find a way to get it or find someone who can.

He's asked me to make peanut butter pie for his school treat. He asks every year, I think mostly because he enjoys crushing the graham cracker - I put them in a baggie and he jumps on them. We're planning his party and he's so excited he gets a bowling party. He wants a skateboard and some cars. Nothing overly extravagant, I think that's another nifty trait of his, he's not greedy.

I'm so honored to be able to say I'm his mother.

My Life - the movie

2009-03-18T00:08:00.003-05:00

It's a movie with Michael Keaton and Nicole Kidman. It's about a man who is diagnosed with terminal kidney cancer, and how he learns to enjoy life basically by dying. That's it in a nutshell.

However it is one of the most moving movies to me. Perhaps it's because my Dad died of kidney cancer, but I cry through this ENTIRE movie. EVERY TIME I watch it, and I have watched it many many times. I find it really cathartic, if for some reason life is pushing me harder than I can take, and I know I NEED to cry, but can't, I watch "My Life". Then I cry and cry and cry. And I miss and remember my Dad, who was NOTHING like the character in the movie. It's 15 years this year since he Died, and at times the wound is as raw as it was on day one.

My Dad was a neat guy. He was the kind of person you couldn't dislike, well as long as you weren't RELATED to him :). I cannot recall him ever disliking anyone either, as long as you weren't RELATED to him (I was VERY good at pushing his buttons).

He taught me how to laugh at everything, including myself. Because if you can't laugh, life just blows chunks.

He taught me to love nature and everything in it, and how to respect it. He was a hunter, ducks mostly, I still hate duck. He taught me how to identify different types of birds while they are in the air. I can still do that - which amazes my kids :) I learned to cook in a duck blind in the dark, and the cold. I can still make a mean duck blind breakfast because of him.

He taught me to cook, to have a passion for food. How when you put the time and effort into it, there is untold joy in watching people eat what you've made.

He was the luckiest sob I EVER met. One time he won 900 in the roll of a day in his favorite bar, then took 20 dollars stuck it into a video lottery machine and won TWO THOUSAND dollars there, THEN took 20 dollars of THAT and won ANOTHER TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS. I wouldn't have believed it had I not watched it happen. I asked him how much he was going to tell my mother he won. The reply was "You'd blackmail you're own FATHER?" I gave him my best sad puppy eyes and said "Blackmail is such an ugly word, I prefer extortion. And yes, yes I would." He paid my rent that month and bought me a boatload of groceries. Not to mention we both drank a few beers at the bar. I still laugh about it.

He was also morbidly obese. REALLY morbidly obese. We had him cremated right away because we didn't want people to look at how big the coffin would be and say "LOOK how big he was!" I couldn't demean him like that.

It kills me my children will never meet him. I see him in each one of them. Lilly has his heart and inability to think bad of ANYONE, and his salesmanship abilities. Lil could sell you and ice cube in January during a blizzard. Vincent has his love of hunting, if my father were alive Vincent would have his own ARSENAL by now. Lol. Isabella has his charm, when she turns it on it's IMPOSSIBLE to not like her.

I really don't know what brought this all up today, but I miss him. More than I could ever express.

Love you Dad!

One proud Momma

2009-03-07T14:24:00.004-06:00

Lilly was in a basketball tournament this weekend. She did really well and I'm so proud of her. They were awarded medals and she is pleased as punch. She also one 2nd place in a basketball skills contest as well. I wish I was athletic as she is! I also cannot get over what a lovely young lady she is becomming.

Workout, ugh

2009-03-03T20:06:00.002-06:00

The gym I belong to is more of a community type center. We use our membership mostly for the pool for the kids. However on my new I want to lose some of this lard on my ass phase..I have begun going to the gym. I mutlitask though, when one of the kids has an activity they go to, I go work out until it's time to go get them. I'm in pain...ow...ow...OW. I really need someone to teach me how to use some of the equipment.

Everyone is well here, we have gotten our spring turkey tags. Honestly I prefer wild turkey from the fall when they are nibbling on corn versus sagebrush. Oh well.
Most all of the processing is done, we still have some jerky to make, but I'm just DONE for now.

I have been planning the garden, much to my children's dismay, I am planting tomatoes. They are the resident pickers - not by choice and their father is quite the task master. It's hilarious. They'll ask what are we doing today...PICKING TOMATOES.....AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!

And there is always the fruit pilfering...well trading. I see a house with a fruit tree and I offer to trade finished product for the fruit. I have a great cherry connection and now a new mulberry connection. YAY!

I think I'm going to do dandelion jelly again this year. I haven't made it for a while and I'm down to one or two jars. It's labor intensive...but very yummy. I wish I had my old milk connection, I used to get raw cow's milk daily - about 5 gallons a day. The cream alone was heavenly. I even made my own butter, very nummy.

So that's life...wishing it was spring...dealing with aching muscles...but overall happy and healthy. And that's just how it ought to be.

Hope it's the same in your worlds :)

This week in my life.

2009-02-26T17:05:00.003-06:00

Lets see, a broken toe, smushed finger.

Today we had an ice storm so no school. I need to start listening to the radio, as I drove the kids to school only to find out it was closed...HA!

One more week of welding class left and I'll be an offical AWS (American Welding Society) certified welder. I didn't think I was doing all that great really, but I found out today that he went up to Greg first thing this morning at work and told him that he had "One hell of a welder" living in your house..and was actually referring to ME! But he never says squat in class, generally giving me more grief than anything else. I'll ask him about jobs I'm thinking of applying for and he'll shake his head and not really say anything.

Now I'm wondering if it's so I don't go for another job and wait until Kolberg's is bringing people back. To keep me there, which from his standpoint I can understand, but I have a mortgage to pay for. Not that we're endanger of losing the house, as we have always planned for the "rainy day" so to speak. But I wouldn't mind paying off the house before Greg is old enough to retire. Not to mention the kids college educations to think of. And I'd just like to get out of debt, which is something we could obtain if we were BOTH working.

There was a job I was nervous about applying for, now I'm pretty stoked thinking I might be good enough to get it. There's a lot of travel involved, not overly fond of being away from home. But VERY good money. We'll see, nothing ventured nothing gained I suppose.

Let all be well in your world.

My life in a 1940's cartoon

2009-02-26T16:04:00.003-06:00

Love this :)

Good Grief

2009-02-25T23:31:00.004-06:00

Well so far this week I broke a toe and smashed my finger. I keep damaging insignificant appendages. Oh well.

Otherwise classes are going well...I should be an AWS certified welder by next week...yay me.

The biggest challenge of my life right now is Bella and bedtime. She is the QUEEN of the stall. Here's our nightly battle.

Me - "Bella it's bedtime"

Bella - "I'm hungry"

Me - "You ate supper, and had a snack, your fine"

Bella -"I'm thirsty"

Me - "You just had a glass of water"

Bella - "I'm not tired"

Me - "If you laid down you'd go to sleep"

Bella - "I want to watch the upside down show"

Me - "It's bedtime"

Bella - insert hysterical screeching here

Me - "It's bedtime!"

Me - carry sed child to her bunk...put her BACK in it for the 8 millionth time. Threaten to send her to gypsies...put her back in bunk for 8 million and 1 time.

Bella - stays still for 1 minute and falls asleep.

UGH!

Sad but true

2009-02-15T19:59:00.003-06:00

This song makes my kids giggle.

Post layoff

2009-01-28T22:30:00.003-06:00

I have been getting the kids back up to par on the school work front. I must sadly admit I hadn't realized how behind Vincent had become. He has made some great progression in the week we have been working together, I'm very proud of him. He just gets so frustrated when he is trying to read. That's the area we are going to battle the most, he's so willing to just give up. Too bad for him his Momma is sooooooooo not going to let that happen!

Lil was struggling a bit with her math, but she's just about back up to par with her class now. She's worked really hard too, and I'm proud of her.

I have had to resist the urge to strangle their father. He was supposed to be keeping them up to snuff. I have always stressed that school comes above all else. If it comes down to it, he can go back to nights so that I can keep these kids where they should be in their educations. And I'm prepared to become the psycho bitch from hell about it too.

I start my stick welding class on Monday. It's 10 classes total...and the first four we have to take a math class as well. I wanted to cringe, here I am tutoring my children with their math and yet I have to take a refresher course. Ugh, however it won't hurt me one bit...well much anyway :)
So I'm excited to have something to do for a few weeks. And my kids will get a kick out of the fact that MOM has to take a Math class. Har har har!

Tea

2009-01-26T21:26:00.002-06:00

Every time we get honey in our house I crave tea. I enjoy drinking tea with honey.

I am also a free sample junkie. If it's free I'm all over it.

Here is where these two things correlate. I had a bunch of tea samples, and now I'm on one of my last ones :( I may be forced to purchase some tea. I have no idea what kind to buy. There are 8 million choices and I'm a lost puppy.

Any suggestions?

So....

2009-01-24T22:53:00.002-06:00

I wish I had some deep philosophical thing to say, I don't. I'm depressed about the lay off. I know there are others out there who have it much worse off than I do. I have loads of things to be grateful for and I am.
I know I am Much more than what I did for a living. My greatest purpose is being a Mom. It's amazing to watch them grow and become the people they are becoming. It was also nice to bloom a little myself, and develop a titch of independence as well. Teaching my daughters (and son too) that a woman can work in an industry that is male dominated. That a woman can excel at that job to, and no matter what they want to be when they become adults, as long as they enjoy what they do, it's not work.
I THRIVE on hard work, on taking a bunch of metal and making something tangible out of it. Remembering how when I first started welding I was scared to death to have to work on anything signficant, mostly doing rinky dink pieces. Then amazingly how that wasn't enough for me anymore, how I wanted to BUILD something, I didn't want to just make something a couple of feet long..or legs for conveyors anymore, but that I WANTED to make the main components. I enjoyed how the guys just treated me like one of the guys. They didn't let me do anything to bag off something that might be a little hard. How much they laughed at me when I welded myself into a 7 foot high rock box. How I threatened to kill them if they didn't get me a damned ladder!
I miss having somewhere to BE. I miss having a check with my name on it. It's hard to even think to go from what I was making to something just above minimum wage.
So I guess I'm depressed.
I still look on the bright side too. I'm starting a stick welding class and hopefully a pipe welding class after that. I'm high up on the call back list for work. Whenever that is. Everyone is healthy and doing well, except for me in a way I suppose.
I'm fortunate enough that Greg didn't get laid off and we still have insurance and income. Some of the guys I worked with don't have that and have to take whatever they can get for work. I know that, but right now I'm just bummed.
I'm just trying not to feel guilty about it.

New Year....new things

2009-01-12T12:37:00.002-06:00

Not terribly much new. I have quit smoking - again. Now for those of you who are about to ream me for being a Mom and smoking, know this. I NEVER smoked in my house or car. I only stood outside and smoked. I did not expose my family to second hand smoke. Anyway I've quit again and so far so good. I have been avoiding any situation where I could be around smokers as well. I'm not strong enough to be around it yet without being tempted back into doing it.

I'm struggling with the whole snacking thing as well. I'm trying to not go near the vending machine at work. I've been packing healthy snacks. But I do slip.

I am lucky enough to still have a job, for now. We have a lay off coming this month and I'm praying I make the cut. But as long as either Greg or I are working we should be ok. But if we should both get laid off it will be interesting to say the least. (We work for the same company...do the same job...he's on days...I'm on nights) We shall see what comes. I can get a job doing just about anything, but I really LIKE welding and my job in general.

Kids are all doing well...Lilly is back in basketball again and loving every minute of it. She's been having some trouble in math, but is working very hard to get better. I'm proud of her!

Vincent is trying to stay out of trouble, and doing a good job at staying away from MAJOR trouble. He has been out hunting with Dad darn near every weekend and loves it like crazy.

Bella and I are having a contest of wills lately. Lucky for me I'm more stubborn than she is - for now anyway! Her latest thing is she doesn't wish to wear clothing at home, she prefers to romp around in her underpants. She's 5....but most of the time this isn't too big of a deal, but the argument to get her dressed is dreadful!

That's about it...still processing deer....still crossing guard at the kids school...still dull as dirt! :)

Hope all is grand in your world!

My cat is too smart!

2008-12-21T19:44:00.002-06:00

The family cat "Carrot" is waaaaaaaaay smarter than I give him credit for. It's been super cold and the wood stove has been working overtime. I was getting worried when I couldn't find him for a while, I finally found him - see pictures :)

Any excuse to have the oven on!

2008-12-14T15:49:00.004-06:00

It is FRIGID! So in order to help the wood stove keep the house toasty, I'm baking bread. I bake a lot of bread in the winter, one just to have something in the oven and two because it gets gobbled up fairly quickly as well. I'm not vegan but my best white bread recipe happens to be vegan. So if anyone would like it just let me know.

I have decided to have meatloaf for supper...it makes good left overs AND I get to keep the oven on without wasting gas :)

Other than that, not too much going on - I turn 39 tomorrow...ugh.

Time always flies

2008-12-07T09:39:00.004-06:00

Friday was Isabella's 5th birthday! HOW IN THE HELL did that happen. It doesn't seem possible that she's 5 already. It was a good birthday she is all Barbied out now. She loves Barbie and if something is pink and barbie - well then it's ALLLLLLLLLLLLLL good!

I have found myself very cranky lately. It could be from the worry of being laid off from work (but if Obama can get the infrastructure package he wants going, things should be ok) or it could be the impending doom of my 39th birthday on the 15th. My birthdays have pretty much sucked every year since my Dad died. He was the one who always made a big deal about it. Even though the eternal optimist in me hopes this one will be better, I'm highly doubting it.

It's been cold lately, not too much snow, but quite a bit of cold. So the wood stove has been working overtime. I had to fix the handles again, them seem to get loose every week or two. I need to get my butt to the hardware store and grab some lock washers, but I never seem to remember.

Greg and Vincent are out looking for a tree. I hate it when Greg picks out a tree. He goes and finds the ugliest thing he can find and brings it home. I LOVE Christmas trees - the way they smell and look, but when he picks one out it's just a pain in the ass and makes me crazy. He just thinks it's funny and I just want to kick his butt.

Sorry I'm cranky - but that is just part of life - good and bad.

May you have more good than bad.

Wow...2 posts one day!

2008-11-24T00:41:00.003-06:00

I can't seem to sleep. I finished my test, I still have some proofreading to do on the dictation portion, but my brain is a bit mushy so I'll do it tomorrow after I get kids off to school.

That is why I am posting twice. I have a confession to make, I have a horrible little guilty pleasure when I cannot sleep. Reality television - more specifically Rock of Love Charm School. I KNOW it is a sad sad thing. This evening I have put some thought into what is being put onto television these days. Visual vomit seems to come to mind as a descriptive term. I cannot fathom how some of these people would go on television and act so foolish just for their "15 minutes". I would prefer to be unknown thank you very much.

Granted here I am posting my thoughts on the Internet. However I am not saying things that I would not want others to know. The beauty of privacy :) Mostly if you don't want others commenting on your life...don't put it out in full view.

I enjoy reading several blogs out in "net land" some are of real life friends who live far away, some are of people I have met on the net and have some things in common with, some I read because they are interesting....well ok more INSTAgating than interesting. That is why I keep some things more private than others. But if you out there in cyber land - if you ever have a question...ask...I may answer, or I may not...but mostly I would :)

Have a stellar night/day!

Burning the candle at both ends.

2008-11-23T19:22:00.002-06:00

The economy has finally caught up to me personally. The plant I am a welder at has begun to lay people off. All of the temporary and part time employee's have gotten notices that their last day will be the 26th. We also were given a letter with our paychecks asking for volunteers to be laid off. The upside to this is if someone was planning to quit anyway they would still be able to qualify for profit sharing under the "vol lay off". I however am not planning to do this. But my neck has a dotted line all over it. I was the last hire in my department, so naturally I will be the first laid off. It is the fair thing, but it still stinks on ice.

So I have picked up my medical transcription studies a little more vigorously. I figure a back up plan never hurts, and the medical industry is one that is relatively stable. And I could work from home setting my own hours, which would be nice to be able to do.

G and I have always planned things around the worst case scenario. I used to think this was a horribly pessimistic thing to do. Now that the economy is a craptastic as it is we are lucky enough to NOT have to worry where the money for the mortgage, groceries, etc is coming from. It doesn't hurt that I never have to buy meat as we hunt all of our own. I garden and can like a madwoman. Stuff like that is the saving grace.

I do feel a bit for those who do not have any idea how to get along without instant gratification items. I think they are going to be in for quite a shock at some point. Where I am optimistic that things will get better, I have a feeling they are going to get a bit worse first. But I'm a prairie gal and I have a family of tough cookies :)

Well back to the books!
Hope all is well in your worlds!

Mondays

2008-11-03T09:33:00.002-06:00

Mondays are odd for me now. After a weekend of sleeping at night and being awake during the day and MUCH earlier than I am becoming accustom to being awake, I get children off to schools and then I come home and cannot sleep. So now I am making up for the lost time this weekend by doing laundry and cleaning the house, ok and dinking around on the computer.

We went hunting this weekend and finally managed to get two deer. Which are now waiting to be processed. G and I will be making salami this week, after I get off work - which is going to suck for both of us. The last thing I want to be doing after I get off work is grinding up deer, but he's going out to Lake Andes to hunt this weekend and we won't get it done then. I always seem to forget how labor intensive it is to process everything. It's worth it in the end for one thing, we know everything that goes into what we process, it's much less expensive as well. But my kitchen always looks like a bomb went off.

I think I am going to hang some clothes out on the line today. It's supposed to be in the 70's and a bit breezy so they should dry nicely. I am putting one or two loads in the dryer just to get caught up. I never feel like there is enough time in a day anymore, or that I have become very lazy. Quite frankly I'm just really tired, I do not get a decent amount of sleep but then again I never have either. Someone at work asked me if I ever did sleep, and I took a second to think about it - I don't "sleep" as much as I "nap". My sleep pattern is a few naps in between the chaos of my life. I am fueled by coffee (home) and energy drinks (at work). It's crazy but it's just the way it has to be.

I am excited about the election tomorrow, history in the making! But there are many local issues I am riled up about as well. The abortion issue is BACK on the freaking ballot AGAIN - this has been voted down (shockingly in this state) FOUR times now. But it keeps rearing it's ugly little mug on the ballot. I just want to scream - HEY...did you NOT notice we voted against it? DUH. Plus the government can keep it's distance from my uterus thank you very much.

Halloween was good - candy overdose as every year. But that is part of Halloween! Lilly was a vampire, Vincent was Alice Cooper, and Bella was a princess. All looked adorable (not that I'm biased!) and they had a really good time. I will NEVER do full face make up on a child again, getting it off a cranky, sugar buzzed child is NOT fun and I swear I damn near had to sand blast it off!

hope all is well in your worlds :)

Christmas Vacation!

2008-10-29T03:15:00.002-05:00

I realize that it is just barely the end of October. We were given a memo at work today that the plant would be closed from the 24th of Dec - the 4th of Jan. This could have been a wage loser for me, but they decided that if you had vacation time coming in Jan 2009 you can use it for the time we're off. Now that being said I only have to use 2 days of vacation time! The 24th, 25th, 31st of December and 1st of January are paid holidays. Since I work nights I only work Monday - Thursday I'm not losing any work time on Fridays. So I only need to use my vacation time to cover the 29th and 30th of December.

So I get a 2 week paid vacation only using 2 days of vacation time! It will also be nice because the kids will be on their break from school as well.

Not too much new going on other than that. Work is still slow - but we are getting our 40 hours a week.

Kids conferences are Thursday, but I think they should go well. Bella went to the pumpkin patch on Monday with her preschool class. She loved feeding the goats!

So that's my life in a nutshell...boring isn't it? And I'm just fine with that :)

Chill in the air

2008-10-26T05:48:00.002-05:00

I love spring and fall, they are my favorite seasons. I love how crisp and clear the air becomes in the fall. The colors of all of the leaves, the end of canning season and the beginning of hunting season.

I also enjoy hearing the geese fly by. There is a flock of Canadian geese that stop at a local park every year. I remember when the first two began to stop here, I was 10 or 11. There are so many generations that now use our "duck pond" as a lay over. Never ceases to amaze me. What is so neat about it is the flocks fly very low over our house to get there, you can watch them change formations and how they look like they are doing barrel rolls. But it's really neat in the pre dawn hours when you cannot really see them, but you hear them. How the volume changes as they get closer.

My father loved to duck hunt. His nickname was "big duck". He taught me how to call in Canadian geese when I was 5. I can still do this although I don't care to hunt geese, mostly because I do not care for the taste of goose or duck. I won't hunt something I won't eat. - I'm strange like that. For me it's not all about the kill, but the process of getting a deer. Trudging through the fields or woods in the dark as quietly as possible (without breaking ones neck!), getting set up in a stand, waiting for the sun to rise. The one observation I have made over the years is the smaller the animal - the LOUDER they are on approach. Deer are darned near silent - but squirrels sound like bulls in china shops!

I really should be sleeping right now - a nap between fire feedings! But this is the quietest my day will be and I enjoy having a cup of coffee, and then sitting outside for a little while before the sun comes up and everyone else gets up. Sometimes I even talk to my Dad, it's so hard to believe that he's been gone over 14 years now. I still get sad when I think he never got to see his Grandchildren in person. He would have spoiled them rotten and made me nuts in the process. I see glimpses of him in each one of them - Lilly has his friendliness and salesman ship abilities. Vincent - has his love of hunting/fishing and helping others for no personal gain. Bella has his charisma - you get drawn to her even when she makes you crazy.

Ah I hear the stirrings of Lil - she is up every day by 6 am! You can set a watch to this child, but she's always been an early riser and it's nice because we get a little visit before everyone else is up. So I'm off to cuddle with her :)

Have a stellar day!

Owie

2008-10-24T09:50:00.003-05:00

I have flash burn. For those of you who do not know what this is, it's when you look directly (or are in close proximity to one) and your eye's get exposed to the direct light of the arc. Basically it feels like you have grit in your eyes at all times, and they don't tear up easily.

I'm going to give the "potato treatment". You slice potatoes and stick them on your eyes. Yes you look silly, but it it makes them feel better then I'm ALL for it.

Greg bought me a new hunting knife. It's really nice - and totally unexpected as well. I have to say he isn't Mr. Romance, but he does surprise me from time to time. I would prefer to have a gift that is useful rather than decadent any day. I'm such a simple gal!

Other than that, not too much going on. Work is good - other than the flash burn. Kids are good - the weather is dreary but oh well.

I'm going to go sit in my chair with potatoes on my eyes!

Interesting????

2008-10-21T03:01:00.003-05:00

I could say I have a delima, but I don't really feel it is. My neighbor is apparently pissed off at me for some reason. She has quit talking to me, and has spoken to all the other neighbors about why she is pissed off at me. However she has said nothing to ME about why she is pissed off. My ego can handle someone being upset with me, tell me what I've done and if an apology is in order I will gladly give it and learn from the situation.

I do however resent the high school drama bullshit she's pulling. So I have decided that if she doesn't wish to speak to me I will respect her wishes and not speak to her. Her kids are still more than welcome to play here, as I would never hold anything against a child.

Now here's the kicker, I've found out she's talking smack about Vincent! THIS PISSES ME OFF SEVERELY! She and another neighbor have yelled at him to get out of their yards and told him he's no good and if they see him in their yards they are calling the cops. THE COPS for crying out loud! The other neighbor she's teamed up with has two sons - and they recently smeared habenero peppers into Vincent's face (barely missing his eyes). Did we call the police, no. The neighbor who is talking all this crap has a son as well - he has WHIPPED my son with an electrical cord, slammed his head into pavement, and numerous other violent acts. Have I called the police on HIM, no. But MY son has the AUDACITY to play in their yards with THEIR kids and the police showed up at my house regarding a "trespassing" complaint. Honestly the cops were more annoyed with the two bitchy women than my son. But I've had it!

These are also women who have asked me for countless favors - which I have done my best to do. I swore I wouldn't let all of this crap get to me, I'd take the high road. But I am at a breaking point and quite frankly just want to scream at them or something involving a baseball bat. But I won't, I will continue taking the high road, because that is what I have taught my children to do.

I am not a perfect parent, I have lost my temper at my children. But I have never called them stupid or worthless or lazy or asshole ( I could go on). My kids are a little strange though, they use words not heard so often these days : Ma'am and Sir, Please and Thank you. They share most of the time. They will help a neighbor rake leaves, shovel snow, carry in groceries. Vincent will hold a door for girls/women and actually say "Ladies first". They are respectful of others and others belongings. They know the value of hard work. They would rather be outside playing than inside playing a video game. They are good kids. And I am blessed to have them.

Ok so that was my rant - on the lighter side:

I set myself on fire at work tonight. Sadly I didn't even realize it until I smelled something burning. The item burning happened to be my shirt, I was very happy I wore two shirts today, if not I'd have burned the crap out of myself.

Teacher work day!

2008-10-20T13:51:00.003-05:00

There is no school today. So I have been breaking up arguments since I woke up. However I mentioned that if they didn't stop grumbling at each other I had plenty of work for them to do. Then the grumbling was directed at me, which I can cope with :) And they did do their chores so it's all good!

I am trying to get everything ready for Halloween. Lilly wants to be vampire (easy peasy), Bella wants to be a princess(a friend of mine made her costume) and Vincent...well as usual he doesn't want to be something standard, he wants to be Alice Cooper. I don't think it should be too tough...however Alice Cooper has long black hair and Vincent has short blonde hair. Naturally I have bought a wig for him, now if I can just keep the cat from playing with it, it should be ok.

I still have a ton of stuff to get ready. I am the youth coordinator for the Moose Lodge here so most parties fall to me to plan and get done. Working nights does not make this easy to do. But I'm certain it will be fun, because these kids enjoy the parties every year. I know MY kids can enjoy a trip to the grocery store. That is one great thing about them, they have a love of life and enjoy just about everything about it!

Right now we are all fighting colds which stinks. Coughing and welding is NOT a good combination! But then again 3 kids with green boogery noses aren't always a good combo either! But it will pass...I always remind myself of that....most of the difficulties will pass. Some not always a quickly as others though :)

Dirt is not so dull

2008-10-18T10:52:00.002-05:00

Tilled the garden under yesterday. We didn't realize how wet the dirt was and it took WAY longer and was a mess. But it's a task that is done.

Today I am trying to discover where my house is under all this clutter. Rumor has it we have a floor somewhere around here. I'm trying to confirm that! I swear since I started working nights the house has gone to hell in a hand basket. One would think after a while things would fall into place but I have to say they are not and sometimes the chaos is just nuts.

Lil is currently working on her "landforms" homework. Once I got her focused she is just going to town. However getting her to start it was a nightmare. But she is doing it and what she's making is really cool, I love seeing her mind work!

Bella and I have been having the battle of the wills today. I swear that girl is going to be the future dictator of Cuba someday! I hear comments about how she and Lil will be such heart breakers someday. Lil's going to be a heart breaker, Bella is going to be a ball buster! That girl is going to tell a guy what's gonna happen, when it's gonna happen, and how it's gonna happen and if he doesn't like it she'll kick his tuchas! (She gets this from her momma you know :) )

Vincent and Greg are at a city surplus auction today. Vincent has explicit instructions to tackle his dad if he tries to bid on the SIREN I saw on the auction bill. Now granted Vince is MUCH smaller than his father, but he is a tenacious little bugger. BUT I think he wants the siren as much as his dad does. GOD HELP ME!

Otherwise not much is going on - I'm dull...but I really LIKE being dull. When my life is exciting it's not usually in a good way.

I really need to update more.

2008-10-17T01:27:00.000-05:00

But sometimes I am just to lazy.

I find myself less and less on the net lately. We have been out hunting every weekend for 3 weeks now. I had Vincent in the tree stand with me one time but he got so excited when we saw a deer he spooked her. But he's only 6 and it does make your heart race!

Right now I am having a tough time with Lil. She has developed the "tude" which is making me crazed. She's 8 going on 30. But the thing that is really grinding my gears is how disrespectful she is becoming. She knows that treating people with respect is so important. But we're getting there, I keep the lines of communications open.

I have begun to feel a bit guilty about going back to work. During the week I really don't see Lilly and Vincent very much, and lately with hunting I haven't had much time to spend with Lilly. Which could be the cause of some of her acting out too. She and I are going to have to do something fun for just the two of us. Honestly I have continued volunteering at the kids school for the afternoon crossing guard so I at least see them before I go to work every day. But I just feel like I'm missing out on things that I shouldn't be.

But I am still going to conferences at the end of the month. I didn't get to meet the kids teachers at the beginning of the year, but I do trade emails with them, so I'm getting updates. But I am used to being able to attend everything they did, and not having that joy is making me a little bummed out. Oddly enough a titch jealous of Greg too, as he gets to do more with the kids now. I had always wanted him to be more involved in the day to day things with their lives, but now that he's here more I am envious.

Work is going well, I had my 3 month review and was given a decent raise. I don't mind working nights (as I've always been a night owl), other than missing my kids, and I enjoy everyone I work with as well. I never really thought I would enjoy welding as much as I do. We are a little slow right now so there isn't any overtime, and it's not looking good for it until the first of the year.
I could live without all the burns I've managed to get. I finally gave in and bought leather sleeves - it's sort of a half jacket, but my arms have not had a burn in some time. I did set myself on fire the other day though, I didn't notice my jeans were frayed. A piece of slag hit them and poof, but sadly I didn't notice until it'd burned up past my ankle. Oh well the chance one takes when they play with fire for a living.

That's about it in a nutshell...I swear I'll keep up on this a little better.

What the heck?

2008-04-25T17:32:00.000-05:00

Todays date is April 25 correct? Then WHY does it look like December outside of my front door. Allow me to tell you why, it would be due to the 6 inches of SNOW falling from the sky! Two days ago it was in the upper 70's and now it's barely above 30. Very, very, very tired of this.

I want to be digging in my flower beds and planting my vegitable garden. I would like to be BBQing this evening, rather than stoking the fire. Oddly enough it is going to be in the upper 40's tomorrow and the snow will most likely all melt.