Tuesday, March 24, 2009

7 years ago tomorrow.

I had a beautiful baby boy. Lilly was almost two years old. I was planning her birthday party while in the hospital.

Vincent has been an adventure every day of his life! When he learned to walk he instantly started to climb! He was given the nickname "Monkey Boy". I am amazed at the kid he's become. He's kind and courteous - he will hold a door open for me or any female and say "ladies first". When it snows he goes over to an elderly neighbor's house and clears her walk, and never asks to be paid. He doesn't even tell them he does it, he just does. He helps me in the kitchen, and helps me haul wood.

He has tested me many times - he used to walk into neighbor's houses all the time when he was 3. He used to take off to the park because he wanted to when he was 4. He's played with matches when he was 5. He's made me want to hug him and strangle him all in the same day, sometimes in the same hour.

He has his own difficulties to deal with - he has a pretty hefty lisp. He's going to begin speech therapy soon. His lisp has made learning to read harder for him, because phonetics don't work for him. The way HE sounds things out and the way they ARE sounded out are very different sometimes. But he never let it get him down. He went to tutoring with no arguments - he even enjoyed it. He's a little guy - he has his mother's height, or lack there of. But it never gets in his way . If he can't reach something, he'll find a way to get it or find someone who can.

He's asked me to make peanut butter pie for his school treat. He asks every year, I think mostly because he enjoys crushing the graham cracker - I put them in a baggie and he jumps on them. We're planning his party and he's so excited he gets a bowling party. He wants a skateboard and some cars. Nothing overly extravagant, I think that's another nifty trait of his, he's not greedy.

I'm so honored to be able to say I'm his mother.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

My Life - the movie

It's a movie with Michael Keaton and Nicole Kidman. It's about a man who is diagnosed with terminal kidney cancer, and how he learns to enjoy life basically by dying. That's it in a nutshell.

However it is one of the most moving movies to me. Perhaps it's because my Dad died of kidney cancer, but I cry through this ENTIRE movie. EVERY TIME I watch it, and I have watched it many many times. I find it really cathartic, if for some reason life is pushing me harder than I can take, and I know I NEED to cry, but can't, I watch "My Life". Then I cry and cry and cry. And I miss and remember my Dad, who was NOTHING like the character in the movie. It's 15 years this year since he Died, and at times the wound is as raw as it was on day one.

My Dad was a neat guy. He was the kind of person you couldn't dislike, well as long as you weren't RELATED to him :). I cannot recall him ever disliking anyone either, as long as you weren't RELATED to him (I was VERY good at pushing his buttons).

He taught me how to laugh at everything, including myself. Because if you can't laugh, life just blows chunks.

He taught me to love nature and everything in it, and how to respect it. He was a hunter, ducks mostly, I still hate duck. He taught me how to identify different types of birds while they are in the air. I can still do that - which amazes my kids :) I learned to cook in a duck blind in the dark, and the cold. I can still make a mean duck blind breakfast because of him.

He taught me to cook, to have a passion for food. How when you put the time and effort into it, there is untold joy in watching people eat what you've made.

He was the luckiest sob I EVER met. One time he won 900 in the roll of a day in his favorite bar, then took 20 dollars stuck it into a video lottery machine and won TWO THOUSAND dollars there, THEN took 20 dollars of THAT and won ANOTHER TWO THOUSAND DOLLARS. I wouldn't have believed it had I not watched it happen. I asked him how much he was going to tell my mother he won. The reply was "You'd blackmail you're own FATHER?" I gave him my best sad puppy eyes and said "Blackmail is such an ugly word, I prefer extortion. And yes, yes I would." He paid my rent that month and bought me a boatload of groceries. Not to mention we both drank a few beers at the bar. I still laugh about it.

He was also morbidly obese. REALLY morbidly obese. We had him cremated right away because we didn't want people to look at how big the coffin would be and say "LOOK how big he was!" I couldn't demean him like that.

It kills me my children will never meet him. I see him in each one of them. Lilly has his heart and inability to think bad of ANYONE, and his salesmanship abilities. Lil could sell you and ice cube in January during a blizzard. Vincent has his love of hunting, if my father were alive Vincent would have his own ARSENAL by now. Lol. Isabella has his charm, when she turns it on it's IMPOSSIBLE to not like her.

I really don't know what brought this all up today, but I miss him. More than I could ever express.

Love you Dad!

Saturday, March 7, 2009

One proud Momma

Lilly was in a basketball tournament this weekend. She did really well and I'm so proud of her. They were awarded medals and she is pleased as punch. She also one 2nd place in a basketball skills contest as well. I wish I was athletic as she is! I also cannot get over what a lovely young lady she is becomming.

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Workout, ugh

The gym I belong to is more of a community type center. We use our membership mostly for the pool for the kids. However on my new I want to lose some of this lard on my ass phase..I have begun going to the gym. I mutlitask though, when one of the kids has an activity they go to, I go work out until it's time to go get them. I'm in pain...ow...ow...OW. I really need someone to teach me how to use some of the equipment.

Everyone is well here, we have gotten our spring turkey tags. Honestly I prefer wild turkey from the fall when they are nibbling on corn versus sagebrush. Oh well.
Most all of the processing is done, we still have some jerky to make, but I'm just DONE for now.

I have been planning the garden, much to my children's dismay, I am planting tomatoes. They are the resident pickers - not by choice and their father is quite the task master. It's hilarious. They'll ask what are we doing today...PICKING TOMATOES.....AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!!!!

And there is always the fruit pilfering...well trading. I see a house with a fruit tree and I offer to trade finished product for the fruit. I have a great cherry connection and now a new mulberry connection. YAY!

I think I'm going to do dandelion jelly again this year. I haven't made it for a while and I'm down to one or two jars. It's labor intensive...but very yummy. I wish I had my old milk connection, I used to get raw cow's milk daily - about 5 gallons a day. The cream alone was heavenly. I even made my own butter, very nummy.

So that's life...wishing it was spring...dealing with aching muscles...but overall happy and healthy. And that's just how it ought to be.

Hope it's the same in your worlds :)