Monday, September 12, 2011

Week 2 well 3 really ha ha ha

So far so good! I have joined a gym and go every night after work. Right now I'm doing the treadmill mostly just to get my endurance up, but I go at 3mph for 45 min with varying inclines so I'm getting a good bang for my buck so to speak. I have also been doing the other machines, but not when there are a ton of ppl in the gym. Still really self conscious about that, however I'm up to 50 reps on both ab machines at 50lbs. I started at 10 if I was lucky at 10 lbs.

Still drinking tons of water and teas. I did have ONE soda last week (hanging head in shame..lol) AND 3 beers last weekend (hangs head in shame AGAIN). And I've reintroduced carbs, and I'm not KILLING myself monitoring them, but I don't eat as many as before.

So far the grand total is 16lbs down...YAY ME! But it's still a long road ahead, I have to say though I like how I have more energy after working out. Odd how I don't feel tired but amped up, so now after my nice lunch I'm going to turn on the tunes and start doing some cleaning around this joint!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Improving myself

About a month ago I stepped on a scale, and practically burst into tears. I knew I was overweight (obese actually) but I had no idea it was as bad as it was. Yankton has decided to sponsor a sort of biggest loser thing called YankTON Challenge. Since the bank is sponsoring us, I decided to sign up. But there are other reasons too, my father was morbidly obese and where kidney cancer is what he died from, his weight was a factor in not finding it sooner. I have struggled with my size for as long as I can remember, not in the sense where I have an eating disorder but to not become as large as he was.

Week one!
I have a bicycle thing I keep under my desk at work, so I've been peddling while working, it doesn't get me any cardio type of workout, but it helps my arthritic knees not hate me so much and it does burn calories. I joined a gym that has 24 hr access, so I go after I get off from work at 1am. Most of the time a friend of mine and I go together, but I'm at a point where I'm even going alone too. Something I would never do normally, however I like how I've been feeling after I'm done and my energy level has gone up too.

I am doing the South Beach diet...phase one. I'm not doing the entire diet that way but I like the phase one where you cut out carbs completely. It's not as hard as you think it might be, although I miss bread and pasta....and beer. I REALLY MISS BEER!!

Greg is doing the challenge too, and he's lost 9 lbs. I'm really proud of him too! I am motivated not only for my health, but just to feel better about how I look when I see myself in a mirror.

After week one....down ELEVEN lbs. I'm proud of myself, and it's a great start. I do know it's going to taper off too and won't and shouldn't be like that each week. It is a great morale booster though!

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Overtime

Both Greg and I have been working quite a bit of overtime these days. It's exhausting, I work from 4:30pm - 1:00 am and I have been going into work from 9am - 11am all week this week too. I did work a couple of straight 10 hour shifts, which are easier than coming in early, but the hours for that haven't been offered for a while. So I'm sleeping less. Which makes for a cranky mom.

Right now my biggest worry is Vincent. He has developed the thinking that he may go anywhere he wishes at whatever time he wishes and does not need to ask permission to do so. This is unacceptable, and he KNOWS this. I have grounded and grounded him and he does OK for a little while then he's back at it. NO MORE!!!!!! I have told him that if he EVER tried to sneak out or goes MIA again I am going to report him as a runaway. I realize this may seem a bit extreme but I'm at a loss of what else to do. The kids he's hanging out with when he does this are much older than he is and he is playing with fire (figuratively as we have not had pyro problems since the "big kahuna" two years ago) It stinks on ice not to be able to trust your own kid to make the right decisions, when you've taught them how to make them.

There are days it's like watching a train wreck about to happen and I'm helpless to stop it. He has potential to do great things, and most days is the hardest working kid I've ever seen. But if he's not directed constantly, he's easily led astray and I fear for him. He's made SERIOUSLY bad choices, and paid the price for those. In losing trust with Greg and me, in having suspicion cast upon him if ANYTHING happens in our neighborhood. These things KILL me inside, and I cannot seem to get through to him. When I sit him down and talk to him, he is genuinely remorseful and tries to do the right thing, but inevitably falls back into the same old patterns.

I only want the best for him, but he needs to understand that I expect better OF him. I am hopeful though that one day the light bulb will glow brightly and he'll get it.

Monday, July 18, 2011

Neglectful

I suppose I've become rather neglectful of my blog. Quite honestly I don't think anyone ever reads it anyway. But I figure I should at least update from time to time.

I'm currently doing this from work, it's nice to be able to have Internet access from my job. It's slow enough tonight that I have time to do this. If it were Monday, forget it, Monday's are hell in the credit card business. I don't know if I will be welding for a living again, the economy is brutal and I have really good insurance right now. I also actually have a 401K that MADE MONEY!!!!! It's not a bad place to work, I just don't make as much money as I would welding, and I don't think I'll get anywhere else in the company except where I am right now. I'm not overly fond of the bottom of the food chain. I suppose I shouldn't complain at all as I know there are people out there in much worse situations, then again I don't think it's that bad to aspire for something better in a place I am at 8 hours every day.

I have come to the conclusion that I am getting old. SHOCKER I know! (please note dripping sarcasm) I have had a few times recently where I've been seeing how the world is an adventure for other people (the younger ones :) ) and finding myself a little jealous of having that freedom.

Then I really thought about it one day, yes that "everyday is an adventure" part of my life isn't as prevalent. I don't wonder where I should go this week, and my life revolves around my children and what they have going on and who needs to be shuttled where. That is sort of the other part of my "midlife" crisis, the children have gone off and gotten LIVES!

I'll say more another time - just don't know what all TO say :)